I never knew nor believed in words like LUCK, DESTINY, GOD, FATE, but today I kind of realized the meaning of these words. My belief and confidence was my GOD. I believed I could write / create my own destiny and I could live my dreams, today I also realized that not all dreams can be realized. Living your dreams would take you away from path of reality and it would lead us no where.
I wish I had been wise enough to learn this lil earlier. In a week I would be turning 27 years, I learnt another major lesson in life i.e. to understand and respect others decision. There need not be a formal way of expressing some one’s decision. Its similar to saying silence speaks a million words. No matter how hard we try, there are few things which we cannot accomplish. Accepting and moving on is the only solution, I admit it now. It’s very hard and tuff for some one like me to admit this cos I never gave up any thing so easily that I want in life, I never mind even giving something a million more trails till I get what I wanted.
Two days ago, Kavin has told me that I am turning in to a total psycho with my adamant and stubborn attitude. He told me that I got only one life to live and I am wasting my time on things which are not worth it. Yes, I was kind of crazy about a gal for last 4.5 yrs and I had been trying to be friends with her at least. Since that’s not happening, Kavin was telling me to forget her and move on as its big time I realized that’s its not going anywhere. He was telling me that none of us can have every thing in life, and we should accept that decision made by nature (say god). I never believed that some one / something could over power me to control my destiny. He also sensed that I am afraid of loosing her, that’s why I am not putting any effort to meet / talk to her. I couldn’t convince myself about this but I told him that I would give my last try or give up.
Last night I happened to talk to Neta and Anshu online. I told Anshu about what Kavin has said the other day. Anshu agreed with what Kavin had said and he also added that I am too emotional and if the only way for her to be happy is without me then I need to understand and respect her decision and I need to accept it or I will get psychologically hurt. Mabbe she doesn’t want to be friends with me because she is afraid of hurting my feelings and she doesn’t want to pity me. I felt this as a very sound reasoning. I realized my mistake that I need to respect other’s decision and if some one is not interested then there is no point running after them. Neta too agreed that her silence is enough to understand which I hadn’t realized so far and any small kid could understand which I haven’t realized it so far. I felt so shocked and my mind became blank and numb and couldn’t sleep till wee hours of morning.
I believe that this is the end of it and I learnt my lesson. I guess its time I also move on with my own world. And I close this chapter of her in my life book here. Period.
I wish I had been wise enough to learn this lil earlier. In a week I would be turning 27 years, I learnt another major lesson in life i.e. to understand and respect others decision. There need not be a formal way of expressing some one’s decision. Its similar to saying silence speaks a million words. No matter how hard we try, there are few things which we cannot accomplish. Accepting and moving on is the only solution, I admit it now. It’s very hard and tuff for some one like me to admit this cos I never gave up any thing so easily that I want in life, I never mind even giving something a million more trails till I get what I wanted.
Two days ago, Kavin has told me that I am turning in to a total psycho with my adamant and stubborn attitude. He told me that I got only one life to live and I am wasting my time on things which are not worth it. Yes, I was kind of crazy about a gal for last 4.5 yrs and I had been trying to be friends with her at least. Since that’s not happening, Kavin was telling me to forget her and move on as its big time I realized that’s its not going anywhere. He was telling me that none of us can have every thing in life, and we should accept that decision made by nature (say god). I never believed that some one / something could over power me to control my destiny. He also sensed that I am afraid of loosing her, that’s why I am not putting any effort to meet / talk to her. I couldn’t convince myself about this but I told him that I would give my last try or give up.
Last night I happened to talk to Neta and Anshu online. I told Anshu about what Kavin has said the other day. Anshu agreed with what Kavin had said and he also added that I am too emotional and if the only way for her to be happy is without me then I need to understand and respect her decision and I need to accept it or I will get psychologically hurt. Mabbe she doesn’t want to be friends with me because she is afraid of hurting my feelings and she doesn’t want to pity me. I felt this as a very sound reasoning. I realized my mistake that I need to respect other’s decision and if some one is not interested then there is no point running after them. Neta too agreed that her silence is enough to understand which I hadn’t realized so far and any small kid could understand which I haven’t realized it so far. I felt so shocked and my mind became blank and numb and couldn’t sleep till wee hours of morning.
I believe that this is the end of it and I learnt my lesson. I guess its time I also move on with my own world. And I close this chapter of her in my life book here. Period.
